@MikeCanRant: People wont mess with you if you eat a cup of yogurt and then smash it on your forehead because youre tough and have healthy bowel movements
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@HenpeckedHal: I bought my mother-in-law a pair of ankle weights for her workouts. She's proven to be a much stronger swimmer than I'd imagined.
@moooooog35: One time I brought my kids to work with me and now my boss is way more tolerant of my drinking.
@SpenceDen: Them: What would you do with a million dollars? Me: Pay off student loans. Them: And with the rest? Me: lol "the rest."