@dragnut: Per Wikipedia, there are two kinds of scorpions. One can sting and kill you like a spider, the other can sing and rock you like a hurricane
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@krissywillbretz: Me: In high school I was voted most likely to cut my own bangs with safety scissors. Interviewer: I meant any professional achievements.
@AKATriple: So apparently it's rude if somebody asks if you have a light & you tell them they'll have to go to the end of the tunnel to find it...
@TheWriteStuff2u: Boss made me put a nametag over my left bosom. I leaned over and said, "Now, what shall we name the other one?"