@michaeljdawson: Perhaps Nicki Minaj just lost a series of bets.
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@TheRolo: [Walking around the office] *Sees nosepicker* *Hears burper* *Smells gas* Boss: What are you doing? Calculating the..."Gross Margin."
@ZaynabHashem2: 2017 whatsapp notification: Linda read your message and texted Morissa and they decided to go to McDonalds without you
@NotMarkAllen: I feel like a taco salad is the worst way to eat a taco, and yet, the best way to eat a salad.