@AmishPornStar1: Petulant: (defn.) a cat or dog you let a friend borrow
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@hipstermermaid: Donald Trump is like the "Scream" movies in that he blurs the line between comedy and horror.
@DanKCharnley: [Job interview] Boss: "What's your biggest weakness?" Me: "I have no weaknesses." *clutches picture of the dolphin that killed my father*