@gorrdano: Pilot makes a sudden sharp turn, comes on speaker "Just kidding!! Attendants will be by with new underwear. Have a nice flight everybody."
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@DaddyJew: 7: I didn't do my homework Me: why not? 7: they told us to write about the new president Me: so? 7: you told me not to cuss
@GrantTanaka: Nietzsche: God is dead God: Nietzsche is dead [they both turn to camera] THAT'S RIGHT, WE'RE DEAD SERIOUS ABOUT OUR MATTRESS PRICES
@SerenityRising: "If you can't handle me at my diddliest, you don't deserve me at my doodliest." -Ned Flanders