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@trojansauce: [pitching a tent]
INVESTOR: this really isn't a new idea
@lianamaeby: The woman seated next to me wanted to know if San Francisco is near the water. I replied, "What's water?" so she wouldn't feel stupid.
@ruinedpicnic: me: maybe those nazi salutes... we're just them reaching for the stars...
McDonald's manager: this is the fastest I've ever fired someone
@AngelaEhh: It's that time of year again, to reflect and remember how much I love my tax deductions.
Kids... I meant my kids.
INMATE: so what are ya in for?
BIG BAD WOLF: well I huffed and I puffed and then I got nabbed for possession
INMATE: goddam pigs
@iamdevloper: Just ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon.
Will keep you posted.