@RegularFred: Pizza is like racism. America didn't invent it, but it's hard to find a country that does it better.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Crunk_Jews: [first day as Tour Guide in History Museum] "And if you look over here you'll see a lot more really old shit."
@MariyaAlexander: My favorite thing to do at a rock and roll concert is to yell “kiss, kiss, kiss” every time the guitarists stand close together and face each other to riff
@mansizedthumbs: Little did he know that his foot powered filing system would have made him billions if he had only thought of a better name - The Ped-o-file