@DurtMcHurtt: Playing dodgeball with kids is harder than it looks cause you have to throw them with both hands.
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@trumpetcake: ANNOUNCEMENT: DENIM CLUB MEETING IS CANCELLED. AVERY RIPPED HIS JEAN VEST AT THE SUPERMARKET. HE'S OKAY, BUT VERY UPSET.
@TeaAndCopy: WIFE: Kate's new baby is 7lbs 11oz ME: WIFE: Roughly ½ a stone ME: WIFE: 3½ kilos ME: WIFE: [sigh] a four pack of beer ME: Oh cool
@kDuncanG: Knuckle Tattoo Idea: * L I V I N G T O O C L O S E T O N U C L E A R W A S T E H A S D I S F I G U R E D M Y B O D Y K I L L M E *
@jordangerous: Facebook: My little man is the best thing that's ever happened to me! Twitter: Free baby. DM for details.