@DurtMcHurtt: Playing dodgeball with kids is harder than it looks cause you have to throw them with both hands.
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@FuckabillyRex: Life isn’t fair. Unless you’re a carny. Then life is pretty much all fair, all the time.
@Molly_Kats: A Victoria's Secret commercial will always come on when you're elbow deep in a bag of Doritos.
@KentTheG: I dated a meteorologist once just so I could be with a woman who wasn't right all the time.