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@Michael_Erhart: "Please don't make a scene." -Horrible movie director
@squirrel74wkgn: "Sir, are you interested in the satellite radio upgrade?"
...uhhhh, for driving in space?
@Manda_like_wine: Sorry I pretended I was drowning so you could see how incredible my hair looked underwater.
@jjhartinger: [second date]
*gets up and leaves
@obviousplant_: Spring cleaning checklist...
"you should have used a tag"
[a horse emerges on luggage belt]
noone else has brought a horse linda
[another horse appears]