@ramblinma: "Please go play with your brother. That's basically the reason we had him."
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@T_N_Crumpets: Wife: Are you crying in there? Me crying: NO! W: have you been eating cheese again? *opens door* Me with mousetrap stuck to lips: NO
@KeetPotato: *1st date* [be cool, just dont let her know youre a 1st generation PS3] so where do y- *internal cooling fan drowns out entire conversation*
@geekonursleeve: [table of 6 year olds in lab coats] How are we supposed to find a cure for cooties if we *bangs fist on table* CAN'T EVEN FIND WALDO?!