@ramblinma: "Please go play with your brother. That's basically the reason we had him."
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@FreshClemonade: Me: "Bond." *lowers sunglasses* "James Bond." Cashier: "You've been doing that for 35 minutes. Are you going to buy the sunglasses or not?"
@wickedsuga: Stop being so hard on yourself. You don't have to be a complete idiot. Just be the best idiot you can be.
@Ready_Set_Nope: I just overheard my kid muttering "I'm sorry you had to see that" to a stuffed toy. It's probably best not to ask what "that" was right?