@Jenny4ashley: Please pray for the people still playing Farmville on Facebook.
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@OLDIRTYDIAPER: Ordinary things that become AMAZING once you're a parent: -showers -sitting down to eat -drinking coffee while it's hot -pooping
@wesleybordelon: Standing in the boys clothes section at Kohls waiting for my wife. I just realized I look creepy. Better move to the little girls section.
@awkwardphilippe: Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded? There was nothing left but de brie