@Try2StopME: Please take the smartphone away from your pets, they are spamming your Facebook with selfies.
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@TheBoydP: [Heaven] Saint Peter: Welcome to the pearly gates! You’re here early; you must be dying to get in! LOL Me: Too soon…
@dulcetry: I just want to be rich enough where I snap my fingers and 7 people fight over who gets to make me my next grilled cheese.
@TheMichaelRock: Hell hath no fury like a white woman emailing Target after a bad shopping experience.