@CornOnTheGoblin: [commercial for soup] NARRATOR: ever wanna drink a sandwich?

@kumailn: Million dollar idea: Nutella, but super healthy.

@JasonLastname: Go into a bathroom stall and write: "For A Good Time Call Your Mother. She Misses You & Enjoys Hearing Your Voice."

@warmyellowlight: some days I'm all [sound of a fluffy cloud violently smashing into a mountain] other days I'm [sound of crocodiles gently eating a mitten]

@slimmy_shady: I have an idea for a website where people seeking to share their views and ideas can get together and ignore each other.