@Book_Krazy: *pokes sex life with a stick
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@Jesssicle: My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard and I'm like "Get outta here boys! I didn't get this chubby by sharing my milkshakes!"
@topaz_kell: When there's a police car behind you with their lights flashing... It means speed up, right?
@DaddyBeerGuy: Wife-CAN YOU CLEAN UP? Me-*Quietly mutters- I don't work for you! 3-*runs out of room yelling- DADDY SAYS HE DOESN'T WORK FOR YOU!
@Carbosly: Do cute firemen still come when a cat is stuck in a tree? Only in case of fire? Fine. But pretty sure my cat won't like being set on fire.