@jimmy_sharpe: Poodles are just angry clouds with legs.
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@Manali_Shetye5: Me: I have to lose weight. Me: I'm gonna exercise everyday. Me: I'm gonna go on a diet, eat healthy and hit the gym. Me: Is that cake?
@KyleMcDowell86: It's only a matter of time before the casino realizes that baby I lost at the roulette table wasn't mine
@SatansTongue: There's something I should tell you... "Oh god what is it" I have crabs "NOOO" *holds up two crabs* "Oh I thought you meant-" And HIV "NOOO"
@miliondollameat: me: wow the stars are beautiful gf: omg babe they really are me: u know who else is beautiful? gf: *blushes* who? :3 me: Harambe