@mcs212: Daddy Longlegs: Proof you need to settle your inner demons before naming animals.

@travisauruss: I like my pizza like I like my pizza: pizza

@hashtag_stacks: If I ever got kidnapped my kidnapper would be like 'why are you so good at sitting in one room for a long period of time without showering?'

@mc_funbags: People who go jogging, you realise we have cars now, right?

@CelticMoonDance: There are no absolutes in this world. Except vodka.