@MikeRevenaugh: Popeye teaches us that the best reason to eat healthy is revenge. #CartoonLifeLessons
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@TheAlexNevil: Parent Tip: don't tell your child "I'm waiting, I can wait all day if I have to" unless you've actually cleared your schedule for the day.
@iwearaonesie: my wife can find a stain on my shirt from across the room but can't see the mailbox when she's backing up?
@SamGrittner: You're one day closer to death AND you get free cake? What’s not to like about birthdays?