@kelkulus: Pot smokers like to say it's safe because it's natural. Other safe natural things include sunburn, poison ivy, and being eaten by a bear.
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@CanadianCyn: I've found a diner. Or maybe it's a house. Either way this little old lady is cooking me breakfast.
@Sassafrantz: My whole life has felt like one big hammock and everybody is watching me try to get out of it.
@KalvinMacleod: ME: all the King's horses and men couldn't put u back together HUMPTY DUMPTY: what now M: [opening package of bacon] I'll think of something
@iAmDelFreaky: Some hipsters were camping next to me and asked for help starting a fire. So, I chased one around until his corduroys burst into flames.