@Roxtalled: Practicing karate in my driveway to strike fear into potential burglars.
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@markleggett: How many kids do you think Wolverine has? Because a vasectomy would heal in seconds and he doesn't look like he'd wear a rubber or pull out.
@TravLeBlanc: A long time ago, I learned the importance of just being myself. I think the world would be a better place if everyone would just be myself.
@dubstep4dads: "hey dad, when did they outlaw hyperboles?" "hmm i dont know son, like a bajillion million years ago? idiot" *cops bust down door*