@NotThatNixon: Praying that Donald Trump is really just Ashton Kutcher performing his most elaborate prank yet.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@nPhelendriqal: This looks like a job for.. *I rip open my jacket* Jacket Repair Man! *I sew my jacket back together*
@E_lok44: When a 230 lb man yells from the shower for a towel, but you hand him a face cloth, he won't find it nearly as funny as you do.
@shkeeber: Her: You into S&M. Him: Sure. Her: Good. *ties him to bed post* Him: Oh yeah. Her: Ready...? Him: Torture me! Her: *plays Nickelback*
@Mr_Kapowski: Me: Want me to bring coffee up to bed? What my wife said: If you want to What I heard: If you want to live