@MaryKoCo: Pregnancy test that says, "Your cart has 1 item in it"
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@Reverend_Scott: God: You finish all 11 commandments? Moses: About the 11th one... God: What? Moses: Check yourself before you wreck yourself? God: Fine, 10.
@QwertyJones3: Dearly beloved, we are gathered together before God & these witnesses to observe the following: 2, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13, 17, 19 -Prime Minister
@PJTLynch:  "Grandpa, how did President Trump ever get elected?" Well, we were a bit distracted. That was the year adult coloring books came out