@Elizasoul80: Presidential election season; that special time every four years when we find out who we just really shouldn't be friends with anymore.
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@shariv67: God is like Justin Bieber. I have nothing against him personally, but his fan club is super annoying.
@clindsaysway: That awkward moment when the person who just made the elevator notices you were holding the 'close' button
@Just_Lee_: The fastest way to find out if your wife is just pretending to be asleep to avoid sex is to pick up her phone and start scrolling.
@ieatanddrink: Dating tip: Girls like guys who takes control. Pick up a horse and ask "Where should I put this horse?" When she tells you, say no