@philyuck: President’s Day is just a holiday invented by Presidents to sell more Presidents.
@timdonakowski: I remember when the History Channel actually played MUSIC!
@yonewt: Listening to "Bad Company" by Bad Company from their album "Bad Company" how do they come up with this stuff
@Jandalize: I want a pet otter just so I can introduce it as my otter half.
@TheTweetOfGod: The Walking Dead is Jesus's favorite show.
@Blondrbomber: When I see crying children and miserable parents- I run to the bathroom, crush up my birth control, and snort it.