@TheMichaelRock: Presidents Day was created by big corporations to get you to buy more presidents.
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@TwoSapphiresBlu: I crave feet in the sand, a gentle ocean breeze, the sun on my face, and two entirely new presidential candidates.
@Miniwheats2012: Me: Wake up son! Son: Just 30 more minutes please Me: I'm borrowing your phone Son jumps of the bed: I'm awake!
@InternetHippo: [Martian welcoming party] We’re so excited to welcome our friends from Ear—ok it’s another robot car everybody. Why do they keep doing this