@thenatewolf: *pretends to get electrocuted when I shake your dad's hand for the first time*
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@urfavoritejoel: Finally got this fire hydrant open, but there was like, the opposite of fire inside
@DustinAHarkins: One time I called my teacher "mom" and she looked so confused and said "I'm not your mom." It made the rest of homeschooling really awkward.
@TylerFoFyler: I'm not saying I did terrible things last night, but Satan just woke up on my couch and won't make eye contact.