@jamdugg: Pretty much everything I know about Caribbean geography, I learned from that Beach Boys song 'Kokomo.'
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@bourgeoisalien: man: you're beautiful me: gross man: humanity is a black hole of stupid and i'm dying inside me: [heart beats fast] oh my god are you single
@LindaInDisguise: 13YO: Why's he happy? He got dog-piled. Me: He made a lot of groundage before getting put down. Husband: Yardage. Tackled. PLEASE LEAVE.
@StcyBnsn: You know what bothers me? When people assume you're homeless cause you're asleep on the street and your pants are gone..