@RandomAntics: Prisons and psych wards in movies always make it seem like an indignity, but I think it'd be nice to receive food through a slot in my door.
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@Barknado69: Today I saw "Jesus doesn't care about your grades" written on the sidewalk in chalk and all I could think was "Thank god, he'd be pissed"
@ArfMeasures: WIFE: We'd have less arguments if he wasn't so pedantic THERAPIST [to me] Is that right? ME: No. It should be fewer arguments
@donni: COP: Anything you say can and will be used against you-- ME: Handcuff keys COP (to his partner): Damn, this guy's good