@AmishPornStar1: Pro Tip: You can disable the surveillance camera in your microwave by heating a metal fork on the high setting for 7 minutes.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Reverend_Scott: ROBIN: Let me drive the Batmobile. BATMAN: Never. I'd rather let Superman- [wall breaks down] SUPERMAN: OMG REALLY BATMAN: No.
@DanMentos: Ben Carson is my favorite candidate whose name sounds like a Transformer explaining to his kid why he hasn't seen him much lately
@JohnLyonTweets: I've never literally been tortured but I have walked behind old people when I was in a hurry.