@michaelianblack: Probably not a coincidence that Taylor Swift just spent $17M on a mansion only two states away from me.
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@roggyie: My wife is constantly accusing me of being racist.I dont care what she says,Im black,shes black,it should concern me that our baby is white
@jilleb163: I didn't realize how many of the songs on my iPod are about sex and drugs until I hit "shuffle" in a car with a 12-year-old in it.
@Tayyxb: David Cameron: "In some parts of Britain there are three generations of families where nobody has ever worked." Buckingham Palace?
@chunkypony: *leaves one gummy bear in the packet* i'm letting you live so you can go back to your king and tell him to send the rest of his troops