@SortaBad: Probably the worst part about being a penguin is after you're in an argument, you'll try to waddle away angrily but still look adorably cute
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@shariv67: I sleep with my grandad's WWII bayonet under my pillow. You never know when someone might break in and start filming Antiques Road Show.
@scarebro: Maybe your parents told you a watched pot never boils so you wouldn't go around sticking your face near boiling water, idiot.
@deardilettante: A fun thing to do would be to eat rat poison during a dinner party & then, when you die, they'll blame the host's cooking. Lol.
@charliedelta7: I don't have instagram, so I thought you guys should know I had Starbucks this morning. The cup was super cool looking. I also saw a rainbow