@HiddenWorId: Problem solved
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@breakfastbeerz: Who called them "homo erectus'" and not... Wait, that's actually pretty funny. Good job guy who named them "homo erectus'"
@XplodingUnicorn: [texting] Wife: Clean out your bowels. Me: OK. Wife: *bowls. The ones in the sink Me: *chugging laxatives* Damn it.
@BonaFideIntent: I just took enough Vicodin to kill a medium-sized Chipmunk. RIP Roy. Roy's the hypothetical Chipmunk. I named him. Has anyone seen my legs??