@bobvulfov: Professor i'd like an extension on my paper. why? well my ex just got married & i have to comment "lame" on all her wedding pics on facebook
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@jenlaw_11: Birds are dinosaurs? No. I want dinosaurs here or I want them completely gone. I don't need a bullshit imitation dinosaur to shit on my car.
@Rollinintheseat: If history has taught me anything, it's that the person with the loudest, wettest cough will always sit down beside me in a waiting room.
@rachelle_mandik: -Can you describe the jellyfish that stung you? -Yes, it looked like a lazy toddler tried to draw an octopus.