@david_tull: *purposely chooses network with most dropped calls*
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@amazymay72x: 13yo: Mom, I need 3 current issues happening in the neighborhood. Me: How abo- 11yo: WEAK WIFI, BUFFERING, BAD DATA PLAN! ..shoot me now.
@JessicaVarsity: Twitter is like a dog: There's always someone who loves you for you... there's also always someone who just peed in an inappropriate place.
@timdonakowski: Don't eat yellow snow. Red snow, on the other hand, is debatable. Could be horrible, could be cherry.
@ericsshadow: For sale: $300 King size mattress & box spring, 6 mo old, Never had sex on it, not even once. IDK ask her.