@Tommytoughstuff: *Puts air guitar back in air case* "Listen if you wanted a "real guitarist" maybe you should put that in the ad!"
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@Brampersandon_: INTERVIEWER: what do you consider your greatest strength ME: ... INTERVIEWER: ... ME (38 minutes later): I'd say promptness
@Parkerlawyer: Me, "I need to get in shape." Hubs, "What flavor? Chocolate or Vanilla?" Me, "Shape, not Shake." Hubs, "So...." Me, "Chocolate."
@DeadLioness: In a parallel universe, a zebra is walking around her contemporary decorated house, on top of a skinned blonde chick with big hoops rug.
@BeardSpice: "Do you have Coke" No, is Pepsi okay "Do you have updog" What's updog "Haha not much and no Pepsi is absolutely not okay"