@Tommytoughstuff: *Puts air guitar back in air case* "Listen if you wanted a "real guitarist" maybe you should put that in the ad!"
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@hardlyrelevant: [I time travel to 1998] Guy: This is the first showing of Mulan, how does that dude in the front row already know the words to all the songs
@jonnysun: *paying $40 to go into a haunted house* finally a peaceful refuge to get away from how scary the world is right now
@therealeatwood: If Trump dies in office he won’t even admit it. He’ll keep tweeting from the grave: “VERY dishonest coroner’s report says I died. Sad!”