@HappyHijabbi: *Puts couch down as emergency contact*
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@ThRealBallsDeep: Boss:Why is your voice gone? Are you ok? Me:*thinks back to me belting out Ariana Grande's "Dangerous Woman"* I'm ok...allergies are bad.
@Dildo_Hitler: *sees Arnold Schwarzenegger working at Walmart* "hey Arnold, kitchen appliances are toward the back of aisle B right?" "YES. AISLE B, BACK"