@Home_Halfway: Raccoons wearing tiny little glasses, digging through trash and carefully reading nutritional information of any food items they find.
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@stephenjmolloy: Doctor: "I think this patient is dying. What blood type is he?" Nurse: "B positive." Doctor: "Okay. I don't think this patient is dying."
@Underchilde: I sure get a lot of compliments on my people skills for someone who flips off 10 people every day.
@KalvinMacleod: [dating game] GIRL: contestant #1 tell me how u would woo me ME: woo like in duck tales woo woo or a different type of woo? G: contestant #2
@Coops_Bradley: Good luck to the 13 year old girl who is pregnant and wrote "California" for ethnicity on her clinic forms.