@JIMBOSWELT: Randomly screaming and moaning in agony is a great way to get a seat by yourself on a packed bus.
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@Ditchful: adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane
@daemonic3: [walks date home] HER: Wanna come up for a nightcap? ME: I gotta work early HER: I have 2 dogs ME:[already running up stairs like Rocky]
@phaggots: Bae: come over Me: can we ever have normal conversations Bae: my parents aren't home Me: why can't you just ask how good my day was for once