@zachreinert03: Read about a 60 yr old woman wanting to swim from Florida to Cuba & felt inspired & wanted to help so I emailed her a picture of a boat
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@truegritrumble: DATE: Do you like sports? ME: *nervously* Sure. DATE: What's your favorite sport? ME: *panicking* Panicking.
@KalvinMacleod: I accidentally took an extra step when I reached the top of the stairs and now I'm in a marching band.
@torrami: My parents and teachers told me I could be whatever I wanted to be but I'm 28 years old now and I'm still not a crime-fighting mermaid :(
@dyldonot: [girl brings me back to her apartment] her: come to bed me: just one sec [velcro noises] [more velcro noises] [too many velcro noises]