@AaronFullerton: Reading about how much Daniel Craig hates Bond is like The Pope Visiting Kim Davis all over again.
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@hippieswordfish: GENIE: you have 3 wishes ME: i wish for one more wish G: um...ok...your wish is granted. you now have 3 wishes M: aweso- wait, what
@CornOnTheGoblin: [PAPARAZZI] Bugs Bunny is it true u were shot by Elmer Fudd [BB]°sips drink° that's ridiculous °water shoots out of holes° No more questions
@envydatropic: Friends don't let friends drive drunk but I don't want them staying at my house And that's why Uber was created