@KenJennings: REAL '90s kids will recognize this! ---> Current unemployment.
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@Smethanie: Baby, you're a firework: You hold my interest for about 15 minutes and scare the shit out of my dog.
@jordan_stratton: Remember, kids: Never get in cars with strangers unless you've used an app to select a specific stranger to drive you around in their car
@turtledumplin: We all have that one friend who thinks they can sing...and if you can't think of who, that friend is you.
@iLikeCatShirts: You'd be surprised at all the discounts you get when you come in swinging a sword!