@ThisOneSayz: Real Estate Agent: it’s a 3 bed, 2 bath...
Witch: ...but?
REA: it’s made out of gingerbread so lots of kids linger around
W: I’ll take it
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@Darlainky: My husband cooked dinner for my daughter and me, or as he so eloquently put it, “Makin’ dishes for my bishes.”
@starsnbars7: When do I get to find my nice Canadian girl to settle down with and have flannel babies?
@blade_funner: Don't go chasing waterfalls. Pretend to be disinterested. Wait several days to call the waterfalls back.
@iGreenMonk: "Just be yourself" is great advice to maybe 12% of people.
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