@figgled: Real women have curves!!! Real women have spirals!!! Real women are plump and covered in a creamy sauce wait nope thinkin of pasta
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@GoldenSpirals: My neighbour left her outdoor stereo blaring & went out for the night. I now have a set of speakers for sale, minus the wires. Call me.
@SpenceDen: It's bullshit that you can accidentally make a baby, but not something awesome like a soufflé.
@shutupmikeginn: A fun prank is to search "buy antique dolls" on someone's computer because then all their Facebook targeted ads are creepy dolls forever