@shegotagronk: Realized it was time to seek help for my Twitter addiction after I opened a carton of eggs and said "Oh look, 12 new followers!"
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@robin_991: 6yo: I wish I was a bird so I could poop on peoples heads. 7yo: why do you need to be a bird? my 7yo is ready for twitter.
@caliluvgirl77: [tightening roller skates] "stop worrying about me mom, I'm in a very dangerous gang, but we are really fast"