@shegotagronk: Realized it was time to seek help for my Twitter addiction after I opened a carton of eggs and said "Oh look, 12 new followers!"
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@tastefactory: HULK:*smashes a tank* IRON MAN:*flies bomb into space to save mankind* HAWKEYE: I have an arrow w/ your name on it pal, hold on stand still
@dubiousrhetoric: Preowned Jaguar for sale. Beloved family member, excellent shape. Wife forced me to put her up for sale after she (the jaguar) ate the kids.