@Jesssicle: Really, iTunes? You need to update my calculator app? Have there been changes to basic math that I'm unaware of?
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@mommy_cusses: My kid sure is great at picking up Easter eggs for someone who suffers arm paralysis whenever I ask him to clean up his toys.
@River_Niles: Interviewer 1: Describe yourself in one word Me: Hired Interviewer 2:[whispers] Holy shit can she do that??
@TheBoydP: Couples have an amount they can spend up to without discussing with each other. Mine is around $50. My wife's is around $643.27. Apparently