@MouVanLee: Reasons why i never let my girlfriend touch my iPhone. 1) I don't have iPhone. 2) I don't have a girlfriend.
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@SondraDeeMe: Roasted beef is like regular beef except the cows family tells embarrassing stories about it, which are tough and tasteless.
@thenatewolf: Scientist: our large brains are what allows us to survive so successfully 10,000 Year Old Tree: k
@WGladstone: "She's got legs. She knows how to use them." "So she's ambulatory then?" "... I guess?" "And is that really all you're looking for?"
@ramenfuneral: "how about an animal that looks like a cross between a horse and a barcode" - creator of zebras