@thatlionkid: Relationship status: binoculars
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@TheCatWhisprer: Relieved to finally get a new microchipped debit card that provides added security to protect the $13.68 in my checking account.
@AndyAsAdjective: "Daddy, did you know Pluto was recently reclassified as a dwarf planet, or plutoid?" "Sweetie, I'm pretty sure he's a dog."
@PhilLaysheO: If a cougar left her teeth next to my bed in a glass of water was that a tip? Do I have to change the water? Do I feed them like goldfish?