@kathybotteas: Relationship status:
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@MsFoxIfUrNasty: [at BBQ] Wow...trying to wrap my mouth around this bratwurst reminds me of my first high school boyfriend. He hated bratwurst.
@internetluke: [comes out of coma after 12 years] ME: Holy shit I forgot to set my AIM status to 'Away'! DOCTOR: you might want to take a seat
@fanofhell: For your final meal request to eat the electric chair and then the warden will be like well now what do we do he ate our electric chair
@LaBelleMae: Here in Canada, we leave everything unlocked so that burglars don't risk getting glass in their hand when they punch through our windows.