@KKAlThani: Relationship tip: every night text yourself "Good morning love!" & turn off your phone real quick to wake up with a good morning text.
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@SabotagedSmoke: Tried to challenge the guy in the stall next to me to a thumb war, now he's holding my hand & crying about his childhood. I need to wipe.
@david8hughes: [police car behind me] Me: shit, was that a red light back there? My dog: like a light grey Me: ... My dog: if that helps