@briangaar: Relationships are mostly you apologizing for saying something hilarious
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@PMTheron1: How much for the best friend? Manager : Sir, we've been through this, our cashiers aren't for sale.
@ariscott: If you ever see a movie where a woman is depressed and she has shaved legs that movie is bullshit.
@Reverend_Scott: [Boss' office] "You're late AGAIN." Drove back for my phone. "Why do need it at work?" It's all I do. "WHAT?" I said, IT'S NICE TO SEE YOU.
@SteveSuckington: If you tell me I can only have sex with your sister over your dead body, your funeral is going to be awkward for some of your family.