@BlakWidowBarbee: Relax lady, you can quit giving me dirty evil looks. I don't want my own husband, so I sure as hell don't want yours.
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@protolalia: Me: You're kidnapping me? Where're we going? Can we feed my cats first? Is there a ransom? Cool van. My name- Him: Changed my mind. Get out.
@KKAlThani: When I'm at a friend's house & there are snacks, all I'm thinking is "How do I eat everything without looking like a homeless person?"
@_sleepysmile: People always comment about how young I look. I just tell them it's because of all the placenta I've been eating.